If you’re comin’ to Texas there are some things you ought to know. We are an independent breed. We don't take kindly to someone tryin’ to change our ways. Please remember that the way Texas has been is what attracted you here in the first place. So, please don’t go tryin’ to make it like the place you left. If you’re comin’ to Texas here are some things to keep in mind.
We say “Yes sir” and “Yes ma’am” and please and thank you.
We hold the door open for ladies and say hello even to those we don't know.
We like Copenhagen, Red Man, and a few of us even roll our own.
Our idea of dressin’ up is starched jeans, a felt hat, and boots.
We don’t like the government tellin’ us what to do so we like to keep it small.
Actually, we don’t like anyone tellin’ us what to do.
The spirit of Bowie, Crockett, and Houston still lives.
We believe in sacrifice and courage and honor.
We keep each other safe with armed, law-abiding citizens.
If anyone ever comes to take our guns they will have to pry them from our cold, dead hands.
We honor our police officers and thank God for them.
We believe the Bible and trust in God.
We sing with Ray Wylie, Billy Joe, and Jerry Jeff.
Dancin’ is a subtle art best displayed with a Two Step.
Fishin’ and huntin’ are more than a hobby, we dang sure eat what we kill.
Friday nights in the Fall are for football.
Baseball is great too but not at the same time as a local rodeo.
We drill oil and we ain’t huggin’ any trees.
Barbecue is the fancy way of sayin’ quality meat cooked low and slow.
If its good it don’t need any sauce.
We like whiskey straight with Shiner as an appetizer.
We eat beef. Steak - medium rare. Burgers - fat and juicy.
We guaran-damn-tee anything we shake hands over.
We don’t mean any disrespect to the other states
but we sure as hell want to keep things our way.
So, if you’re comin’ to Texas please keep these things in mind. If most of this sounds good to you, then come on down. Just remember the way Texas has been is what attracted you in the first place. Don’t go tryin’ to make it like the place you left.
